misadventures in st louis

this is an old post mostly unedited but I think it's much better than the crap I just wrote as I was trying to leave work... it's from april of last year

I'm not entirely sure how many people knew I was going to st louis for a game on thursday... so guess what I went to see a cardinals game...An old room mate of mine from utah is going to medical school in maine and decided to take a road trip and see as many ballparks as he could on his was from utah to maine, so I decided I'd at least meet him for the st. louis leg seeing as I've been a cardinals fan since I was old enough to know what baseball was... The trip started off alright I picked up some vodka redbull and gatorade to make a little tucker death mix in my camel back... while I don't condone drinking and driving the drive to st. louis is VERY boring so I HAD to do SOMETHING... so I arrive in st. louis about 2 30 am and I call my friend tracy to see what hotel he has decided to stay at and he seems to think it's a good idea to stay in east st. louis cause it's cheaper... I immediatly begin to drink even more... scared that this may be my last day alive... I tell him my fears of staying in a place in east st. louis so his solution is to stay in st. charles wtf... it's like a 50 minute drive on the far west side of st. louis so 415 rolls around and I finally find the hotel... needless to say I've had alot more to drink ... 1100 in the morning rolls around and I don't feel so well but guess what the game is at 1200 so I have to get up. hooray for seeing albert pujols! (who was out of the lineup btw) we make it to the game and all we have is shitty standing room only tickets... when out of the sky shines a wonderful bright light in the form of a scalper with tickets in the 7th row. I manage to talk him down to 20 bucks apiece for $80 tickets... I'm awfully proud of myself... I think I deserve a celabratory beer... after I finish the tucker death mix I brought with me of course... I was a little surprised at the lack of security... oh well so I end up standing in line for about 20 minutes just to get a goose and cranberry... I'm not terribly excited by that. oh well fuck it... I flirt with the bartender to get a little extra goose... this doesn't work because I'm fat but sometimes forget this fact... oh well fuck her... needless to say I got drunk anyway and generally made an ass of myself talking about thai prostitutes trying to get a reaction from the hot 40 year old chick with fake breasts in front of us... anyway I had given the standing room only tickets away to some kids looking for tickets earlier so I figured this would be good karma.. right??? alright skipping ahead several hours (mostly because I can't remember them) I went to dinner with my friend susan (who is actually my live in girlfriend with whom I have a baby who knew my life would change so much in a year) who happened to be in town also and I was still a little drunk thank goodness her family didn't know... oh well so after dinner my friends decided they were going to go to the casino... I was intrigued... I'd never been to a casino, I avoided them due to my addictive personality... seriously I drink too muh I smoke too much I've done too many drugs... I pretty much get addicted to anything and everything I shouldn't... long story short I'd like to thank missouri legislators for limiting a person's one day losses to $500 otherwise I'm sure I'd be homeless shortly... stupid black jack... I went up huge I was up like 600 bucks at the five dollar table... so naturally I thought I'd go hang out at the 25 dollar table... bad idea.... I proceeded to lose all $1100 in less than two hours... worst part is I spent all my drinking money gambling... this low rent shit hole of a casino actually charged for drinks ... wtf... I'd think they'd want me drunk to lose all my money... well looks like it happened anyway.... and anyone want to go to the casino?????